If you found $1,000,000 in a dumpster, what would you do with it?

Before I did anything with a million dollars, that I found in a dumpster, I would first take a minute to analyze my life and how I got to the point where I was in a dumpster looking for something that was actually worth while... I would no doubt have to think for a very long time about it, because I can not for the life of me imagine myself in any dumpster anywhere looking for something.

I would suppose that after the initial shock of realizing that I was actually in a dumpster, I would then proceed to the bank and deposit half of it into my savings account. I would of course explain to everyone that I had found it in a dumpster in hopes of creating a fad for dumpster diving. I would find it amusing and would justify my reason for being in that dumpster with that fact alone.

After depositing half of that money, I would then proceed to buy a house. I would probably buy a house that cost no more than $300,000. With the rest of the money, I would pay off the mortgage for my church so that they would not have all of the financial restrictions that they have. I'm sure that they do not have that much left on it, so the rest of that money I would use to refurbish the church and school.

Now, back to the money that I banked. I would leave it there and never touch it. Let it gain interest, and I would continue working. Perhaps I would pay off my loans for school after I graduate, but then would never touch it again and simply continue in my career until retirement, at which point the money would have compounded into million and I would have the most fun an old man could have. I would get a wood shop in my backyard, and an art studio upstairs. I would have the most insane entertainment center that you had ever seen in a 65 year old's house.